Mixed Signals
by Iliveinnerdfighteria
Summary: Megstiel. Meg knows she's a demon. She can't love. But if that's true then what is happening to her?


Sam's whole story just made her stomach turn. Meg cringed away from the words that didn't seem to have an end. As a demon she didn't take to others. Besides the connection of possession. Romance was foreign to her.  
Although that wasn't exactly true.  
And that's what made her so uneasy.  
Meg was feeling something that she'd only heard about from creatures beneath her in intellect and power. Humans to be specific.  
Love. Such a human emotion.  
Only they are stupid and naïve enough to allow themselves to be so attached to another creature that they would risk their own life to protect them. Love, she had come to realize, was a weakness that she wasn't capable of.  
Or was she?  
As she listened to Sam's story, bits of it hit her like lightening. Unwillingly she saw blue eyes blinking in the red demon proofing before her.  
She realized, a little late, that Sam had fallen silent beside her. She longed to ask him what it felt like to be in love, but she had a certain reputation to uphold.  
"Wait, hold on. There's one part I don't understand. You hit a dog and stopped. Why?"  
Sam scoffed, "You mean that whole story and that's your takeaway?"  
"No I heard the rest. You fell in love with a unicorn. It was beautiful then sad, then sadder. I laughed, I cried. I puked in my mouth a little..." For a moment she stood on the edge of her next words. Would it give away too much? Honestly, telling someone would be a relief. She didn't really understand it herself.  
"...And honestly I kind of get it." There was no taking it back now. Sam's eyebrows furrowed in confusion but before he could speak they had company.  
She welcomed the routine of punching and being punched; stabbing and blocking stabs. This was something she was used to, something she was good at.  
As the last demon fizzled out at the end of her knife she smiled contently until a voice spoke up from behind her.  
"I've got a bone to pick with you Moose. After what you did to my poor dog." The drawling British accent sent chills down her spine. She spun and watched Crowley approach.  
"I'm here for the stone with the funny scribbles on it." His condescending tone tore at her nerves but she kept her smug smile plastered on her face. No good could come from him knowing that he broke her in the dark pain filled room this past year.  
Sam's voice broke her reverie, "That's not going to happen."  
Crowley's smile was all wolf, "I love it when you get all tough, Sam. Touches me right where my bathing suit goes."  
To her everlasting credit, Meg managed to hold down the laugh that rose in her throat at the look on Sam's face.  
Once a demon always a demon.  
But Crowley pulled out his angel blade and suddenly she felt like she'd never laugh again.  
The decision lay before of her: if Sam fought and died, Dean would never forgive her and by extension Castiel.  
If she let him go she would most certainly die. A martyr perhaps.  
But it would be for love.  
What a sappy way to go.

A memory played in her mind like a gift from heaven to give her strength.

"Why are you so sweet on me, Clarence?"  
It was a semi-serious question hidden behind an almost mocking smirk.  
But of course, Castiel didn't pick up on that. He answered truthfully.  
"I don't know."  
Something inside her jumped at not immediately being shot down.  
"...and I still don't know who Clarence is."  
He was so beautiful in his confusion.

Meg pulled out a knife of her own and turned to Sam.  
"Go. Save your brother..."  
Their eyes locked for a moment at her words, "...and my unicorn."  
Sam understood. That was something at least.  
This was a fight she couldn't win. But she could buy them some time.  
That was worth it right?  
Crowley didn't waste any more time before attacking. He started with a psychological blow, "Timon and Pumba tell you their big plan? Did they share that little chestnut with you? They mean to close the gates of Hell, sweetheart. They mean to kill me and all the demons – you included."  
She didn't respond. At one point that might have bothered her but there was really no reason for her to live anymore.  
Not quite a human, but not fully a demon.  
Her half life was doomed from the moment she sat down in that hospital: a comatose angel at her feet, worming his way into her heart.  
Before she knew it she was bloody and sore, painfully trying to pull herself to her feet.  
Crowley grasped her collar and she used his arm as leverage to rise.  
His lips curled into a cruel smile, "I could beat on you for an eternity."  
A witty retort rose to her lips but the squeak of the Impala's doors made her glance over her shoulder.  
What she saw brought a pained smile to her split lips.  
"No Cas in the back seat. Your stone is long gone."  
His face fell in disappointment and the moment's distraction gave her enough time to drive her blade into his arm. His grip on her shirt loosened and she slipped away.  
For one second she thought she saw freedom.  
But Crowley's blade was too quick.  
The pain in her stomach was sharp and it furled out like a flame, engulfing her borrowed body until everything went dark.  
Peace at last.


End file.
